It really does take a crack on the head or a knife in the gut to make me pay attention.
So, I made this terrible quiche. It wasn't the first gluten-free baking that I've done, but it does symbolize all of the kitchen disasters that I've been having lately.
Fear has crept into my cooking. Or is it despair? A who-cares-what-I-make attitude that sums up the spoiled, gluten-free brat I've become? Or fear + despair - attention = crap food?
That freakin' quiche up there. All of it's creamy custard made out of backyard eggs and milk fresh from the cow (not mine, someone else's) was absorbed by the stupid, yet tasty gluten-free crust. Oh, but wait. First this happened.
Every recipe I scanned for advice said to use a tart pan. ALL OF THEM. I'd never used a tart pan before when making quiche, but I had one and figured I'd give it a whirl. Wrong. The hateful gluten-free crust was too soft, and you can see (kind of — I quicky grabbed my phone, and I think it was steamed up from the ridiculously hot temperatures in the kitchen that other day) what happens when quiche liquid melts big, gaping holes in a crust in a tart pan with a removable bottom.
So much for quiche lorraine. The ingredients were now gone, gone to the trash when I tossed the whole thing away. I could have scraped the bacon and onions out, maybe added a little cheese and a new custard mixture, right? No. Not at all. The crust somehow dissolved during the time that I took my picture, called in the dogs to clean the floor, and snatched up the tart-pan-with-the-removable-bottom. Besides, who wanted quiche lorraine anyway?
(more after the jump)
Too freakin' bad. In my fridge, I had squash and I had goat cheese and that actually didn't sound too terrible. I salted the squash slices within the very last inch of their life to remove their excessive water (you know how squash likes to hide the fact that it's mostly water until the very last minute, when SLAP! It releases it all at once). I threw another crust in a pyrex pie pan into the freezer for extra firmness, blind baked the crap out of it, filled it with the rest of the ingredients and threw it back into the oven.
The squash was great, the goat cheese was good, but the custard became a one-inch thick rice-flour Frankenstein of a dish. Pure crap. I've eaten three slices today and I still hate it.
The moral of this story? Use this pie crust (if you're gluten-free). Please. Not mine, not ever. And then make the recipe below. (And I'd just like to mention that I concocted this recipe using Michael Ruhlman's invaluable smart phone app based on his book, Ratio. Buy the app, buy the book, buy something by Ruhlman if you ever want to cook well).
Summer Squash and Chèvre Quiche
- 1 cup of whole milk
- 1/2 cup of cream
- 3 large eggs, beaten
- 1/2 cup of thinly sliced summer squash
- 2 teaspoons of olive oil
- 1/4 cup of crumbled chèvre (I like the egg-y custard to shine through)
- 1/2 to 1 teaspoon of salt (your call)
- White pepper to taste (it looks prettier)
Prebake (blind bake) the pie crust. Here's how: after the crust in its leak-free pan has been in the freezer for 30 minutes, prick it all over and line it with parchment paper or foil, and fill with beans, rice, or even pennies. Bake for about 15 minutes at 425 degrees, checking frequently to avoid burning. Remove beans and liner, and return the crust to the oven for about five more minutes, until golden. Set aside.
Bring the oven to 325 degrees. (I opened the door for a while, swooning with heat stroke.)
Slice the squash thinly. Line a baking sheet with paper towels, place the squash slices in one layer on top of the paper towels and then sprinkle with coarse salt. After 30 minutes, blot firmly with another layer of paper towels and gently wipe away as much salt as you can. Heat the olive oil in a medium skillet and saute squash slices until soft.
Whisk the eggs in a medium bowl and add the milk, cream, salt, and pepper. Whisk again vigorously.
Layer the squash slices in the bottom of the pie crust and sprinkle with the goat cheese. Carefully pour the egg and milk mixture into the pie pan with the rest of the ingredients. Bake for 25 to 30 minutes or until the quiche is puffed, golden brown and slightly jiggles when you move the pie pan.
Allow to cool and pat yourself on the back. It didn't cascade all over your kitchen floor like mine did.